***Holidays are not my favorite. Be honest with yourself…are they REALLY yours??
Every day I journal. It’s part of my healing process. While it’s not for everyone, it most definitely is the thing that has helped me through this most difficult of seasons of my life. Halloween has always been “my” holiday. I’m not into Christmas. I’m not an Easter kinda gal. July 4th sets off my PTSD, and I’ve decided I’m just not “people-y” enough anymore. Maybe it is age, or maybe it is just the hell I’ve been through and deciding I’m better off not associating with others much if I can avoid it. But Halloween, that’s my jam. Not this year. I didn’t wear my Queen hoodie or don my tiara as I have for the last 7 Halloweens. I don’t know what the deal is, but it just wasn’t in me this year. And sadly, I don’t even care that I don’t care.
The day before Halloween, I drove through Scooter’s, one of our little franchised coffee shops, and when I got to the window to get my Pumpkin Caramelicious Latte, it was in a Christmas cup….WHAT??????? Can we have the other holidays first?? I mean, I actually asked the barista that very question! She just shrugged and said “here’s your coffee. Have a blessed day.” I pulled away feeling both like a total jackass and completely aggravated. Not at her, mind you, but at the snowflake shaped, Christmas light decorated wreaths all over my paper cup.
In today’s journaling, I was writing how I just wasn’t feeling any of the holidays anymore, how there was no joy in them for me. And suddenly, like Gru in Despicable Me, I had a LIGHTBULB moment. I’m going to declare war on the holidays! All of them. From Christmas to Mother’s Day to National Bosses Day. Why do we have to feel the pressure to be holly, jolly people during the holidays? Why do we have to burden ourselves with huge cookouts for Memorial Day or expensive firework displays for the Fourth? I’m over being told HOW to feel or WHAT is expected from me.
Instead of shopping for Christmas gifts that will be forgotten by the end of January, why don’t we spend the time with our kids, watching movies and eating popcorn laced with M&Ms? Or, if the mood strikes, why don’t we nap all day? REST!! That’s a great idea to me! How many of us actually get enough rest anyway? Why don’t we just decide that stress is a word and feeling we aren’t allowing in our worlds during any kind of holiday, acknowledge its presence, and fix it? You get stressed at the thought of seeing your family at the holidays? Don’t see them! Imagine that! Does the thought of finding the perfect gift for your boss stress you out every October? Give your boss a high five and say thanks for being awesome and leave it at that. I’m pretty sure most bosses would appreciate that more than any random gift that is going to collect dust on their desk anyway. They just want you to show up and actually work! Here come my favorite two words…It’s Okay!!!!!!!
If you are a holiday aficionado and you put your tree up six weeks ago, you do you, boo!!! Decorate away. Sing your carols. Drink your hot chocolate, spiked or not. Have at it. It’s okay!!!! But don’t poo-poo those of us who are Grinches. Don’t try to change us or try to sway us to the other side. It’s not a-happenin’ hot stuff! (A golden egg if you know the movie) There is a reason we are the way we are, and unless you are Doc Brown and can go back and change the timeline, you are out of luck! Also, legend has it that it snows in early November in Kentucky when “you people” put up your decorations before Thanksgiving…just saying. We will be blaming you for any early snow lol.
Maybe I’m off my rocker. Maybe I’m a horrible person, but I’d be willing to bet there are more people who think I am on to something than think I’m crazy. And I’d bet a dozen Krispy Kreme Glazed Donuts (my faves) that if you were totally honest with yourself, what I’ve described sounds a little like heaven to you. So maybe it is time. Time for a war cry….
1…2…3…4….I declare Holiday War!!!!!
Love you most,
Lacy
